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  • posted you have to set boundaries. not only for other people but, for yourself. self will got us nowhere.
    • fuzzy1973 well, if you have done a proper 4 and 5th step (or some kinda of moral inventory) that's a start for things to watch out for in others and more impotently- yourself. if you know a certain person, place, or situation is going to be trouble, chances are it is. there is no shame in choosing not to go into a bar 'just for a hamburger and fries with a friend" if you feel uncomfortable about being around alcohol; always better safe then sorry. if some one doesn't show respect for your choice in sobriety, they are probably not going to be a good influence on you. but most importantly; you have to learn how to put your sobriety first for yourself, not anyone else.
    • HeatherO True story but it can be tough. How do you do this without creating stress and using?
  • posted happiness is an inside job. there is no one who can create happiness for you other then yourself; my sponsor told me this and i hated him for it because he was right! there is no person, place, or thing that can create a lasting sense of happiness unless we learn to find it and build upon it within ourselves. we have to stop thinking that "i need a girlfriend/ boyfriend, some piece of materialistic status so i can move forward with my life/ recovery; it's something i really need". what we are really saying is "i need some one/ some thing to use as an excuse to be miserable and blame when things don't go my way and playing God fails".
  • posted old habits won't keep you sober or clean. you have to be willing to change! yes, we all have our comfort zones and routines. but, if we keep doing the same old thing (people, places things, thinking) and finding excuses for it. we'll eventually find an excuse to relapse.
  • posted there are a lot of different support groups/ fellowships for dealing with different addictions. not every "group" is for everyone. so if you are suffering from alcohol, it may not be a good idea to go to a narcotics addiction meeting and vice versa. although most fellowships are (or in my opinion 'should" be) tolerant of others, you also have to be respectful of where you are and what you say. we all want to be of service, but you can't fix a leaky pipe of you're an electrician.
  • posted happy labor day everyone! remember to make a meeting; most 12 step programs still have meetings regardless of holidays.
  • posted one of the things i see (and have a hard time myself) in recovery is the difficulty with "principles before personalities" in fellowships. you'd think we'd all be in this together. it's hard enough dealing with "normal" people, let alone other alcoholics (or whatever addiction you suffer from). although i try, what are some things YOU do to help get thru the day in and out of rooms?